


Anime Club

by Robot_Face



Category: Hiveswap, Homestuck
Genre: Anime, Earth C (Homestuck), Hiveswap AU - Sburb is played and they all go to Earth C, Hubris, M/M, Post-breakup awkwardness (Dirkjake), References to 4chan, Subs vs dubs, Swearing, Troll Sailor Moon, Ultimate Dirk Strider (extremely brief appearance), debate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:34:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22454263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Robot_Face/pseuds/Robot_Face
Summary: Dirk decides to get out of his apartment for once.Dirk/Tegiri. Dirkalbur?
Relationships: Dirk Strider/Tegiri Kalbur
Comments: 3
Kudos: 29





	Anime Club

His name is Dirk Strider. And he’s been pining for anime again.

Day in, day out, it plagues his mind. More than Jake English. More than the yawning cosmos of omniscience that his consciousness is slowly being opened up to. The thing is, there’s just not enough of it. Earth C has failed to create anything that could possibly stand up to what Earth proper - his own flooded wasteland of an Earth - gave birth to. Of course he had left a wealthy catalogue of only the best anime in the year zero in hopes that when they time traveled forward it would pay off, but that seed had failed to come to fruition. It just wasn’t that popular. The fledgeling population of Earth C had no cultural context, no well-developed critical scene to open their eyes to its beauty, and so it had been ignored and forgotten, deep within the archives.

That, truly, was the tragedy of this planet. He’d have to go start another, and make sure this new life form would develop something new he could watch.

There’s a knock at his door. He flash-steps to the peephole. Nobody.

Grabbing his sword, he cautiously opens the door. Still nothing. There are pamphlets all over the floor of the hallway. He picks one up.

Anime Club

Meets Wed. 4:30 at Maryam Public Library, Troll Kingdom, meeting room 4.

He looks back at his computer screen. Wednesday, 3:00. Cutting it sort of close, mysterious pamphlet distributor. Oh well. He has just enough time to find his anime hard drive, then he takes off.

What? No. This never happened.

Dirk shakes his head and fends off the voice. They’ve been bugging him for some time, along with alternate memories and even a couple full-blown visions from other worlds. Sometimes, it feels like his brain is unraveling, like a coiled-up cable tied to a boat that’s accelerating away from the shore. Talking to people helps, as does anything that can keep his mind occupied. He turns his thoughts towards the club meeting. In the Troll Kingdom, of all places. That’s sort of unexpected, isn’t it? Not that Dirk has any ill opinions of their tastes in media, it’s just that anime came from human culture. Any trolls who like it enough to form a club must be really passionate about it. Or, well, there was an analogue, right? "Eastern Alternian animated art?" Neither Karkat nor Kanaya had collections, though, or would’ve even cared enough to make it a part of any curricula.

He touches down at the library gate, and quickly glances over some signage. Meeting rooms are on the third floor. He quickly makes his way up the stairwell. Entering the third floor-

TEGIRI: You’re ear/y.

Dirk whips his head around. It’s a scrawny troll guy, tealblooded, with a katana on his back, underneath a backpack.

TEGIRI: That is, presuming you’re here for the anime c/ub.  
DIRK: That’s correct.

Dirk pushes his shades up. The teal sticks out his hand.

TEGIRI: Tegiri. Ka/bur.  
DIRK: Ah... Dirk. Nice to meet you.

The two shake hands, exchanging steely gazes. There’s a moment of silence.

DIRK: So, are you like in charge of the club?  
TEGIRI: Of course.  
TEGIRI: I have not met a sing/e other sou/ who was prepared enough to take on such a /eadership position.  
TEGIRI: /ucki/y for them, I am generous enough to we/come newcomers to the art, given they are inte//ectua//y hardy and of sound mora/ character.  
DIRK: Right. So are we drawing from the archives? Because I have a few shows that-  
TEGIRI: I have an extensive persona/ co//ection which I am making avai/ab/e to the c/ub for the duration of its meetings.  
DIRK: Well, I can’t see how you’d possible have anything that wasn’t already-  
TEGIRI: Trust me, Dirk.

Tegiri looks around, almost conspiratorially.

TEGIRI: A/most the who/e of my co//ection is nowhere to be found in the "archives" here.

Dirk frowns.

DIRK: Mind if I take a look?  
TEGIRI: Not at a//. /et us proceed to the meeting room.

Tegiri strides decisevely towards room 4. There's a rolling shelf thing with a TV, a DVD player, and a nest of cables. Whoever set it up definitely had no idea what they were doing.

TEGIRI: Api/ogies, this techno/ogy is unfami/iar to me.  
DIRK: Yeah, it's pretty antique.  
TEGIRI: Antique, yes. I was ab/e to make it functiona/, however.

He kneels down in front of the DVD player, and almost reverentially presses the open tray button. Opening up his backpack, he retrieves a disc, but stops just before putting it in. He looks at Dirk almost suspiciously.

TEGIRI: Subs or dubs?

Ah, the age-old conundrum. Dirk knows his answer, though.

DIRK: Subtitles, obviously.

Tegiri scoffs.

TEGIRI: You can't be serious.  
DIRK: Dubbing is a corruption of the original director's artistry. You can't expect American voice actors to properly convey the full emotional complexity of characters written by and for Japanese people.  
TEGIRI: That may be true of your "human anime," but that on/y more fu//y convinces me that it's inferior.  
TEGIRI: Te// me, if one of your "Americans" cannot comprehend the emotiona/ spectrum of a "Japanese" artist, how can you yourse/f c/aim to be a true fan of anime?  
TEGIRI: You have just admitted to me that your own grasp of the art form is stunted.  
DIRK: My bad, I misspoke.  
DIRK: All I meant was that the more intermediaries there are, the more muddled our experience of the original art.  
DIRK: The anime itself exists only as a perfect projection in the author's mind. Written down as a script, it's distorted slightly. Nobody reading it will picture it exactly as intended.  
DIRK: It's further warped by the artists and voice actors. Skilled though they may be, they leave their messy fingetprints all over the pure soul of the virgin idea.  
DIRK: Everybody working on a piece of art has their own agenda. They take the anime and bend it slightly - or not so slightly - to ther will.  
DIRK: Adding yet another layer of this for dubs does nothing but further this process.  
TEGIRI: And what makes the view of the origina/ author so worthy?  
TEGIRI: As you said, it is impossib/e to view the anime as it exists in the director's mind. Just as it is impossib/e to see the animation as the artists see it, to /isten to the soundtrack as the composers hear it, to understand the characters inside and out as the voice actors have understood them.  
TEGIRI: An art form that contains so many different forms of artistry cannot possib/y be created by a sing/e person. It's an individua/ist de/usion.  
TEGIRI: Imagine if the great Miyazaki had to create Empress Mononoke on his own. To compose the score, to p/ay each instrument, to draw every frame, to speak every character's /ines.  
TEGIRI: It wou/d be rubbish.  
TEGIRI: His intentions are meaning/ess: A// that matters is what we, the u/timate viewers, consume. The qua/ity of the artistry is heightened when every aspect of the anime is forged from the wi// of someone with an understanding of the who/e of that aspect, not a sha//ow and unfocused understanding of everything.  
TEGIRI: What have you /earned from anime, Dirk, if you haven't /earned the power of teamwork and friendship?  
DIRK: Well, that doesn't-  
TEGIRI: And to provide your voice for dubbing a/so is an art! Those who do so must have a comprehensive understanding of the source materia/. Think of it not as a bastardization, but an adaptiation. The fact that you cannot see it as such is why I must insist that this c/ub focus primari/y on A/ternian anime.  
DIRK: Wait, where the hell did you get Alternian anime?  
TEGIRI: I to/d you, it's my persona/ co//ection.  
DIRK: Yes, but none of it is available. None of the troll progenitors had any before Alternia's destruction.

Tegiri raises his eyebrows.

TEGIRI: A/ternia's destruction?  
DIRK: Um. Yes. You're taught about that in school, right? Because it would be kind of fucked up if-  
TEGIRI: Ah, yes. Of course. It s/ipped my mind.  
TEGIRI: /et us proceed.

He hastily puts in the DVD and presses play.

TEGIRI: We have a few minutes before the others arrive. Whi/e I wi// not concede for the main duration of the c/ub, I am wi//ing to humor you just this once, whi/e we wait.  
TEGIRI: It's good for one to cha//enge one's own be/iefs.

Tegiri sits down cross-legged on a folding chair. Dirk follows suit. It appears to be one of those weird Alternian knock-offs, which aren't really knock-offs because they were independently produced by troll culture. From what Dirk can gather, it's sailor moon.

Tegiri notices something in Dirk's expression. He turns around, looking smug.

TEGIRI: Need anything, Dirk?  
DIRK: It's- Um.  
DIRK: Can we switch to dubs?  
TEGIRI: Why? Were you not just arguing that subs were superior?  
DIRK: Well. I can't read the subtitles.  
DIRK: They're in Alternian.  
TEGIRI: But you can hear the origina/ actors' intents just perfect/y, no?  
TEGIRI: Is it not a sub/ime experience, being ever so s/ight/y c/oser to the pristine intent of the origina/ author?  
DIRK: Look, asshole, just because I can't read fucking Elder Scrolls letters upside down doesn't mean I need to take back anything I fucking said. You're wrong about artistic intent and you're wrong about anime. Oh, I'll put up with you for now, but mark my fucking words, I'll have control of this little club within the year, and when that time comes, we're watching MY anime, MY way, and you're going to LIKE it. Do you even know who I am? Because it really seems like you cant tell you're talking to a fucking God. Dirk. Dirk Strider. Yeah, the Prince of Heart, asshole. Who are you, the regular-ass person of fucking nothing? What bed did you die on? What denizen did you bargain with? What Ultimate Alchemy did you complete?  
TEGIRI: I see.  
TEGIRI: So you're the person in charge of this p/ace?  
TEGIRI: You know, I was so confused when I got here. I had never seen more than two- maybe three- humans in my /ife.  
TEGIRI: I didn't know what to make of it. This was supposed to be our reward, right? A wor/d of our own? Why had the game dumped us into someone e/se's p/anet?  
TEGIRI: We//, I've got a news f/ash for you. You and your.. e/even friends, was it? You've got a who/e new pantheon of Gods to dea/ with. We're coming for our rightfu//y-earned throne. You're a bunch of pretenders, warming our seats for-  
JAKE: What ho! Is this the anime club? Ah tegiri! Sorry im a bit-  
JAKE: Oh. Dirk.

Dirk's demeanor immediately changes.

DIRK: Jake. What a surprise.  
DIRK: Tegiri and I were just discussing the direction we want this club to take.

Jake can feel the tension in the room. Surprisingly, the amount created by himself and Dirk is not what stands out.

JAKE: Well uh.  
JAKE: You chaps can share right?  
JAKE: I honestly dont think there are two people more qualified to run this.  
JAKE: I believe in you!  
JAKE: You know i suppose i should have expected you to come to this dirk.  
JAKE: Its just you havent left your apartment in weeks!  
JAKE: If anything im actually glad to see-  
TEGIRI: You two know each other?  
DIRK: Yes. We were very close before playing the game and then creating this planet.

Tegiri's eyes narrow. He's outnumbered. His body stance shifts slightly.

TEGIRI: I see.  
TEGIRI: And you had not deemed it necessary to mention this, Jake?  
JAKE: Well i sort of just assumed you knew!  
TEGIRI: Deception by omission.  
TEGIRI: You are a dishonest man, Jake. I noticed it from my very first conversation with you.  
TEGIRI: I did not consider it a mora/ fai/ing because it was c/ear/y not born from ma/ice, but now knowing you're one of the ones responsib/e for this-

He gestures around him.

TEGIRI: I am not so wi//ing to /end you such sympathy.  
DIRK: That's not fair.  
DIRK: Jake didn't know you were a god, either.  
JAKE: Egad! This man is a god?  
DIRK: Now, Tegiri, listen. There's no need for a fight.  
KUPRUM: >eastern alternian fine animated art club  
KUPRUM: >already swarming with humans  
KUPRUM: >mfw  
DIRK: Oh, else here come the edgelords. Who else should I have expected at an anime club?  
DIRK: Did Jane even make an analogue to 4chan?  
FOLYKL: no  
FOLYKL: this planet is full of normies  
TEGIRI: Kuprum. Fo/yk/.  
DIRK: Some of your friends, Tegiri?  
TEGIRI: I wou/d ca// them "acquaintances." Nothing more  
FOLYKL: its because hes a fucking prude  
KUPRUM: >cringe weeaboo who only watches anime approved by the empress  
KUPRUM: >at least i only want to fuck her lololol  
JAKE: Right... er...  
JAKE: If nobody else is going to put something on i brought a show we could watch!  
FOLYKL: televisions all yours freak  
JAKE: Okay.  
JAKE: I hope everyones okay with both subs and dubs because i like to read the more faithful translation but it really helps me follow if i can understand whats being said out loud!

As he says this, a couple more trolls arrive at the door, and just like that, Jake English becomes the de facto leader of the anime club.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Twitter if you want @nonbinarylatula


End file.
